Interviews about Relationships- Becca Wolfe

Becca Wolfe Lamont House Class of 2015

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H: How would you describe your relationship?

B: I would describe it as very chill.  Neither of us are very drama driven people. I don’t consider myself a drama person and he is less so. We are both very calm when we talk things out and that makes it a ton easier than other relationships I have seen. We’re also silly.

H: How long have you guys been together?

B: We have been together for almost three years.

H: What are the good things about being in a long distance relationship?

B: You don’t have the time restraints. You have all the time to study and have a social life apart from that relationship and you don’t necessarily feel the need to be in constant contact.

H: How often do you guys talk?

B: There are different mediums for talking. We Skype for a little less than once a week for at least an hour. We usually have some kind of contact once a day on Facebook or text and it’s more of a, “Hey how was your day?”  As we have been apart for longer and have gotten more comfortable with that, the contact has gotten less.

H: What are the not-so-good things about being in a long distance relationship?

B: I would say one way to think about it is a relationship but without most of the benefits. You still have to put in the effort but you don’t get the warm and fuzzies and physical contact until you go back for break and then it’s awesome. 

H: Do you have any advice for Smithies getting accustomed to a long distance relationship?

B: Relationships are all very different but I would say that less is more. Allow yourself to be separate enough that you can have your own lives and don’t worry about having to know every detail of what the other person is doing.  

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why can’t I put on my shoes?

Even the most avid exerciser has had this experience:

You schedule a time to workout. You get to the time. You look over at your shoes and… ugh. You just can’t.

Even though you know that you’ll feel better if you do it, even if you actually WANT to exercise, something inside you just won’t let you get your butt out of your chair. It’s like you’ve been velcroed to it, or like your butt has turned into a paperweight. You just can’t.

Why does this happen? Why, when we get to that moment of exercising, are we suddenly filled with dread, fatigue, procrastination, and a strong desire to do ANYTHING ELSE?

One strong hypothesis is that it’s because we evolved on a savannah where running was for SURVIVAL, and your body wants to hold on to its energy in case of an emergency. Even diehard runners have that “ugh I don’t want to put on my shoes” feeling sometimes, because it has nothing to do with how exercise makes you feel and everything to do with your body not really being convinced that it won’t be called upon to run from a tiger or hunt a gazelle.

What do you do about it? Here are some ideas.

Knowledge. I think just knowing that this is a phenomenon helps. When you feel that “ugh” feeling, you can say to yourself, “Thank you, body, for letting me know that I’m not currently under attack and I don’t need to hunt for food. That’s awesome! I’m gonna go anyway because I know I’ll feel energized and glad to be there once I start!”

If that doesn’t do it, you can try tricking your body. Get up to do something else – go to the bathroom, pick up a piece of paper, read a bulletin board, anything. And then continue on to put on your shoes, workout clothes, or whatever else you need to do.

And finally, you can make a deal with yourself. “Look, I’ll put on my shoes and go outside/to the gym/wherever, and if I STILL don’t feel like working out, then I’ll _______________ instead.”

Oftentimes once you get there, you decide, “Well I’m here anyway, I might as well do something.”

Make it not exercise time but… “True Blood” time! Or whatever! If you use your exercise time to do something else too, like watch a favorite TV show, spend time with friends you otherwise don’t necessarily see, or shift gears out of academic mode to give your brain a rest, then it’s not so much “it’s time to exercise” as it is “time to do…” whatever else, something that you totally WANT to do!

Interviews About How to Manage Stress- Emma Doeblin

Emma Doeblin Class of 2016 Lamont House

Crew, STRIDE scholar

 

H: What are your academic interests?

E: I am really enjoying anthropology, Italian, and history.

 

H: What is your hardest class?

E: Reacting to the Past, a First Year Seminar that requires a lot of research.

 

H: Which of your activities causes you the most stress?

E: My STRIDE scholarship gives me stress because my advisor requires a lot of research and I want to make sure that I am getting enough information that is relevant. 

 

H: What are some techniques you use or things that you do to help with stress?

E: I try to get more sleep. I know that’s really sort of cliché but I know that the more sleep that I get, I am just more calm and better able to handle things.  Taking a nap if I can fit one in and exercise really helps me because it gets rid of some of that high- strung stress (high heart rate, pent up energy, every thing is ahhhh!!). 

 

H: What is your go-to form of exercise besides crew?

E: I really like weightlifting circuits because it keeps your mind occupied.  When you’re on a treadmill things get boring but during a circuit you are working your whole body and doing different movements. It makes exercising seems more productive and interesting. 

 

H: How does crew help with stress?

E: The exercise is obviously an important factor in that. But also the community because I am very much a person that feels that spending time with people I enjoy being around is a great way to detox and de-stress. When you’re with a good group of people that makes you happier.  Rowing is also something I am passionate about. When rowing feels good, it is one of the best feelings. 

 

H: What was your most stressful experience this semester and how did you deal with it?

E: There was a day earlier this week where I had a mid-term, a lot of research for a professor, and I had two crew practices like I had had every day that week. I was exhausted and hadn’t gotten any sleep really and I had a lot of work to do. I was just very stressed out.  I took it one step at a time, thinking right now I have this practice, and then I am going to do this research. Step-by-step, if I focus on the immediate thing, everything else doesn’t matter. Image